Happy

Dear Liz, Clara, Thea, Mikayla, Grace, Amber, Brooke, Serena, Meenal, Sofi, Pauline, Omar, Montana, Claire, Chesca, Carina, Sofia, Olivia, Michelle, Eve, Daena, Katy, Hudson, Selina, Russell, Josie, Sofia, Taylor, Chris, Mary Paige, Sophie, Becca, Saanya, Dani, Keryna, Rafa, Beth, Georgia, Mila, Joyce, Mia, Laura, Ria and Ari,

Hello everyone! So the last time I did an all-call to the mutuals post, it was because everyone seemed so sad or lost or generally unhappy. So I wrote "Be Beautiful" for you guys and a lot of you said it helped you and that it came at the right time. The same thing has been happening this week and I really wanted to do this for you guys again. 

People often ask me how I'm always so happy and positive, and while that isn't always the case, I do try to be as full of life and grateful as possible.

Number one: if you want to be happy, you have to be happy on purpose. Abraham Lincoln said "most people are as happy as they've decided to be."

Number two: keep your life in the right perspective. Most of us have something to be happy about right now: our health, our friends, our family, or an opportunity. 

I've found we create much of our own unhappiness. We always see what's wrong rather than what's right. And I understand that sometimes it can be so, so hard to see the good in a situation. I understand because I've been there, and it's not fun. 

But here's what you need to do. Wake up in the morning and go through the day singing and enjoying life, regardless of the circumstances. That's how to start off each day. Put a smile on your face, even if it's fake. Fake it until it's real. Smiling tricks the body into feeling good. Go out into the day and be determined to enjoy it.

If it's a problem you have within yourself, look into the mirror and say "Listen here, self. Cheer up. Put on a new attitude. We're not staying down. We're not staying defeated." 

When dark clouds are over your head and you feel like life is depressing, always remember that right above those dark clouds the sun is shining. You may not be able to see the sun in your life right now, but that doesn't mean it's not up there. The dark clouds will not stay forever. The sun will shine in your life once again.

If it's a problem with other people, I have more to tell you about that because that's the pain I know. I've learned a few things about that.

What a person says about you does not define who you are. His or her opinion of you does not determine your self-worth. This person has every right to have an opinion, and you have every right to ignore it. I've found that some people feel it is their calling in life to point out what others are doing wrong and where others are missing it. They're constantly critical, always finding fault. Rise above that. You do not need them to agree with you. You do not need to win their approval. Let that go, and just be who you were made to be.

You don't have to respond to every critic. You don't have to prove yourself to them. Some who will cross your path simply don't want peace with you. No matter what you say or do, they will not be won over. Even if you were to change, they would still find some reason to be critical. You have to accept the fact that no matter what you do, some people will never be at peace with you.

When you have your strength under control, you realize "I'm bigger than this. I will not let them pull me down. I have places to go, goals to accomplish, dreams to realize."

Now how do I move forward without seeming jolting?

For me, a big part of being happy is about being grateful.

If you struggle with staying encouraged and staying grateful, make a list of everything you've been blessed with. If you have your health, write it down as an asset. If your vision is good, write that down too. The same with your school, your friends, your family. Make that list and then go over it throughout the day. One of my New Year resolutions is to write down at least one thing that made me happy that day.

You have to realize that every day is a gift. What a shame to live this day or any other day defeated, depressed, negative, complaining, with no enthusiasm. We all have obstacles. We all have things to overcome, but our attitude should be: "I'm not living this day sad or negatively or focused on what I don't have. I'm changing my perspective. Thank God I'm alive. Thank God I'm breathing. Thank God I'm healthy. Thank God for my family. I'm living every day to the fullest."

***

Remember to always be joyful and glad-hearted in rough times, because when you lose your joy, you lose your strength. You need your strength more than ever in these times, and your strength is dependent on your joy.

You can keep your joy by knowing that on the other side of every test is promotion. On the other side of every setback is opportunity. On the other side of every offense is growth. The difficulties you face are not there to defeat you. They are there to increase you. Just remember "Even though this is hard, even though I don't understand it, even though it's not fair, I'll keep a good attitude and stay full of joy, knowing that this is not setting me back. It is setting me up to get to the other side of this in an even better position."

We can all celebrate and be grateful when we're on the mountaintop, but where are the people who keep their happiness even as the bottom falls out? Where are all the people who wake up in the morning prepared for victory despite all the news reports predicting doom and gloom? I believe you are one of those people. I believe in you with great faith. Your roots go down deep. You're doing the right thing even though the wrong thing is happening.

You have to come to a place where you can say "I don't have to have my way to have a good day. My plans don't have to work out for me to be happy. Everybody doesn't have to treat me right for my life to be enjoyable. I have already made up my mind: No matter what does or doesn't happen, I will stay in peace and enjoy this day."

When a bus hits you and you're lying in the street, it might take you a little while before you can stand up again.
And sometimes, when you go to stand up, your legs won't come with you...because, well because they got hit by a bus.
So, you lie back down and absorb the feeling of that pavement and feel the pain a bit longer. But then you try again. Eventually, the feeling returns to your legs...even if it's temporary.

The thing is, I hate being sad. I hate being negative. And while I may be teased on my over-positivity, I too wallow in a bad mood from time to time. However, I've found I am quite healed by the Fake It Till You Make It Strategy--searching for the good (and there's lots to find), writing about the good, taking pictures of the good, talking about the good--basically bathing in the many little things that bring joy to our life until I am no longer faking it, I believe it completely and have allowed the good to rise above the bad in that ever present glass of "Half Full." Unrealistic? Perhaps, but I don't think so. Regardless, I'd much rather live life as an unrealistic optimist than a realistic miserable pessimist. It's so much more fun.

Thinking of any of you struggling or failing or being sad breaks my heart into a million pieces, so please, please try to use this post.

I love you all so much. I love you just the way you are. You can be annoying, awkward, difficult, loud, messy, stubborn, insensible, and good god you've been known to say strange things. But you make my life so much better. Thank you for making everything in this world more beautiful just by being you. You guys bring light to every little thing in my life. Because of you, I have a new found belief of goodness in the human race. I like to play the cool and confident role from time to time, but let's face it...no one is too cool or confident to not be affected in this extremely motivating and beautiful-self-worth way by the incredible things you have given to me in your words. And they are so incredibly touching. There's just so many good people who really do care about others who are hurting. You are honestly one of the main sources of my happiness. Thank you just for being you. I love you I love you I love you.

Love,

Naomi

It's Christmas

It's still Christmas, we are saying--because I need to say that to stave off the blasted decrescendo of post-Christmas let-down.

When I was just beginning to fall in love with writing...back in the day when I ratted my bangs one, two, three times with my turquoise comb and spraaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyed every last dead end of 'em, slowly and evenly, with the tall, cold can of hair spray...back in the day when I'd click back and forth between red ink and blue ink on my four color pen...back in the day when my third grade teacher, Mrs. Clark, told us the world was our oyster and we were its pearl...I met my friends, the Adjectives, and fell hard and heavy for them. They had me at beautiful. They slayed me with delicious. They charmed me with alluring and exquisite and pulchritudinous (yeah, you heard me...pulchritudinous...look it up).

Over-adjective-izing will forever be my problem. Because I like beautiful and amazing and pulchritudinous, and when I'm feeling it? I want to shout them all...to echo from the mountaintop "I'm blithe." "I'm elated!" I'm intoxicated with exhultant joy and, oh for God's sake, I'm so over the top, I'm begging for someone to slap me in the face.

But, I'm going to try and go easy tonight. Because, really, I loved this week. I loved it. It was one of those nothing-special but because of that, so-very special Christmases, all in one. And yes, that sounds very unicorn-and-rainbowish, but I'm a little unicorn-and-rainbowish, so I guess that's okay. And just to confirm that thought, I got up to get a drink a minute ago, mid-post, and my head hit a set of windchimes hung from the door...and it made this little harmonious plllltttiinnnggg sound which kind of sounded like unicorns and rainbows, and well...there you have it. Okay, so now I'm laughing.

It was a beautiful time, you know. A happy one. Not so happy that it was out of touch. No, it was grounded with just a little bit of well, that's life. Because I felt a little sad yesterday, for no particular reason I could come up with. It did kind of have something to do with feeling inadequate and a very small amount of insecurity, when I returned to the past and anonymous critics. But that doesn't distinguish me from any other teenage girl on the planet right now. Happy? Yes. Celebrating all that 2013 has given me, from the people to the places to the experiences? Yes. But due for some closure where I can go to that place again some time with no purpose but for to say "Hey, I'm back" to those thoughts and feelings and make a moment of that something sacred happened there, and then finally, try to let it go...yes. But, that's life.

And with life comes breathing and feeling moments.

My favorite part of Christmas? When the morning spills over into complete calm. Everyone finds a different corner of the house, we test out new gifts, adults rest on couches, the mess on the living room floor dissolves into the setting and everything is quiet and happy and good. I collapsed on the couch late morning, not intending to sleep, but I fell into one of those half awake naps where my eyes were closed and my brain was off duty but I was very aware that I was smiling and listening to the chatter and Christmas songs and everything was as it should be.

For some reason, I was positive that some part of Christmas happiness and cheer and whatnot would make me cry, but alas (term coined from Claire. Thank you, Claire) it did not happen. We didn't even notice when night came. We were busy, happy, making cookies.

And my favorite part of Christmas came next. Mia and Rafa, my little Christmas angels whose presense makes me feel like I could do anything. They wrote me letters and made me feel so wonderful and happy.

And that one? Well, that one made me cry.

We're still in vacation mode. And feeling so thankful for family and home.

To scrapbooks being filled with much love.  Chin-Chin.

Thank You

Can I talk about Twitter? I want to talk about Twitter.

There is an ancient Native American story about an old Cherokee who told his grandson about the battle that goes on within us. "My son," he told him, "Inside every one of us dwells two wolves, one evil, one good. The evil one is angry and jealous, full of regret and arrogance, greed and sorrow, guilt and self-pity. The other is good. He is kind and loving, full of hope and peace, joy and compassion."

The young boy thought about it for a moment. "Which wolf wins?" he asked his grandfather.

The old Cherokee smiled and simply replied, "...the one you feed."

About a year ago, I sat down and decided I wanted a swiftie account, so I changed my account to accomodate that want. It wasn't a very planned decision much like my other spontaneous whims. In fact, I hadn't even really thought through what I'd title it, but when the server asked for a username, my first attempt at pecking out "likeanarmyguy" pulled up an available name, so I took it. Red was about two months old and my heart was swelling uncontainably with this grand appreciation for Taylor Swift and life and moments, and I needed to let the air out somewhere. That and the fact that it was mid-December, I was pretty high on Christmas, and tweeting about my enthusiasm to a fanbase known for its Christmas loving idol was a better choice than duct-taping the Christmas Fig candle to my face for a continuous sniff-fest. So, likeanarmyguy became this place. This place that has grown and stretched and changed its name and challenged both my creative being and my philosophical one.

I've been asked the standard Why do you have a twitter? question a handful of times now, and while my answer used to include all sorts of long-winded responses, it has now come down to a simple answer: I tweet because I enjoy it. I also enjoy clicking "Buy It Now" for a great pair of shoes on Ebay, but tweeting, unlike Buy It Now, gives back. It feeds my good wolf. And after a year, he's a big boy, that wolf. Strong and ferocious, confident and kicking.

We all have our different methods of feeding the good wolf. And when we find our wolf growing with any particular method, we make time amid our busy schedule to continue to feed it. Maybe you're motivated by running or grounded by baking. Perhaps you are inspired by painting or refueled by lunching with friends. Whatever the case, feeding the good wolf is essential for our ever hopeful quest for life fulfilled.

And then there's this bonus that comes with twitter. And here's where you come in. For all the skeptics out there who say the Internet has replaced the beauty of simpler times and is slowly ruining our ability for real social interaction, I beg to differ. Because without the Internet I wouldn't have all of these beautiful, amazing friends who enlighten me and share my passions and are so beautiful and who teach me to be a better person.

In particular, they are these people. (and this is not a particular order, so just search for yours. I'm going straight down my following list)

mochaswift

Grace. I love you, darling. You are funny and spirited, caring and loving and zesty and wonderful. Please never lose that, because it will take you so far in life. Thank you for teaching me to shine and be myself.

distancetimings

Brooke. We don't talk as often as I'd like, and I wish we would. To me you are defined by funny tweets, good twitter packs, and a beautiful heart. I wish we had a closer friendship. I love you so. Thank you for teaching me about being such a kind and lovely person.

classicswift

Serena. I have been so blessed to be able to talk to you these last few months, and you are so heavenly. I absolutely love you. Thank you for teaching me about all of the good and beauty people like you possess.

suckerforswift

Andie. I love your light -- it's one of my favorites. Your determination and knowledge is so admirable, and I love you for all of your little cute, funny tweets. Thank you for teaching me about your lovely light and for helping me to mold my own into something like yours.

inhalingswift

Sofi. Hey beautiful girl, I think you're fabulous. You are so wise and I think you're pretty great. That is all for now. Thank you for teaching me about being strong and insightful, just like you are.

exhaustedstyles

Pauline. You are an angel from above. I love that you live in California and that you always like my instagram pictures and that you are just you. I love that you. Thank you for teaching me to be more confident and fearless.

yearwithoutrain

Omar. You are filled with imagination and love and humor. You make me laugh daily and I am so thankful to have someone like you in my life. Thank you for teaching me about... well, imagination and love and humor. You are insanely perfect to me.

endearingtaylor

Montana. Oh, you are so lovely, and seeing you in pain kills me. I hope your beautiful, funny personality never ever gets crushed again. You are so flawless, just as you are. Thank you for teaching me that it's okay to not be okay.

hurricaneswift

Claire. I don't know where to begin with you. Our friendship is enriching and heart filling. You are uniquely wonderful, beautiful, talented and capable. Thank you for teaching so very much about life, that it would take me an entire post of its own to list everything I adore about you. I love you so.

nightsgotcold

Chesca. Oh my goodness. I can't begin to tell you how much I love you. I can't begin to tell you how wonderful you are, how spirited and lovely your very existence is. Thank you for teaching me about shining my light and being as beautiful as you are. (oh yes, and thanks for teaching me how to make a wrapping paper bow)

ughswifts

Carina. I love your imagination, your problem solving skills, your creativity. I love your funny and sarcastic comebacks to anything we jokingly insult you with. But mostly, I just love you. Thank you for teaching me about laughter and life.

hemmingswifts

Jess. Your heart is so sweet and tender towards others and I want to be as beautiful as you are. Be different, be unique and be proud of who you are, because you are such a heavenly person. Thank you for teaching me about all the magic you hold.

swiftwithsirens

Hudson. Have I told you lately how great you are? You are funny, caring, full of spirit and so all around admirable. I love you a lot. Thank you for teaching me about the way simple words can have a huge effect on someone, like, say, making them smile when all they want to do is cry. You've done that for me, so, thank you friend.

poeticswift

Selina. You are wonderful, you are perfect, and you are exactly who God made you to be. Never doubt that. I love you so, so, soo so very much. Thank you for teaching me about smiling daily -- because you make me smile daily.

CARASWIFTS

Russell, you send the best tweets. Seriously. You know exactly what to do and say to make people happy and you are so adorable I just want to hug you. Thank you for teaching me that your world, and my world and this world, should be a kingdom where happiness never dies.

oxfordswift

Sofia. You are smart, beautiful, capable and colorful. My world is constantly made better by you, and I love you very much. Remember that. Thank you for teaching me about kindness and beauty and love.

coloursinautumn

Taylor. Oh, I love you so much. Your presense in my life is so empowering, so inspiring, and so enriching. You are so beautiful, and I'm just waiting for you to realize that. Please always have confidence in this world that trys to steal it at every turn. Thank you for teaching me that beauty is not something that can be defined -- it's something that's inside of us. And baby, you are filled with it.

GenerousSwift

Chris. I don't think you'll ever understand how much you mean to me, and I miss talking to you. You are funny, amazing, and so deserving of happiness. I love you. Thank you for teaching me that not all guys are rude and disrespectful, some are actually really sweet and great like you.

soundofineedyou

Mary Paige. I love your compassion, your empathy, your generosity, and the way you love -- they are all traits that are so completely beautiful on you. I just love you so much. Thank you for teaching me about one of the ways beauty can be defined: in the form of a red-headed, horse riding, Swift loving, heaven of a girl from Nebraska.

itsruhbecca

Becca. I could never, ever be able to describe to you all that you mean to me. Not if the entire thing was its very own language. I love you so, so much you perfect work of art. Thank you for teaching me about all the good and love in this world.

wonderfultay

Dani. I love you so very much. You glitter my world with life and full on beauty. You are kind and real and you make me smile. I want you to realize your potential, your beauty, your worth. Thank you for teaching me about being confident and shining my light just as beautifully as you shine yours.

DIVERGENTSWIFT

Keryna. Darling, you are so beautiful, it is wonderous to watch. I'm taking this oppurtunity to cheer you on for everything you are -- just as I will always cheer you on. I love you. Thank you for teaching me about self worth, and self confidence.

breaksburnsends

Rafa. Oh, I've been waiting to get to your name. Any attempt at threading words to just how wonderful, how healing your existence is... it seems so small. But I love you. And have I told you today how happy your smile makes me? Thank you for teaching me to breathe and let go when people are cruel or nasty. That was such an important lesson. I love you I love you I love you.

thearmourfalls

Mia. You are the most confident, kind, caring person I know. You are a free thinker and have stood your ground through the toughest of times this year. I always tell you how much I love that about you. Thank you for teaching me about self-worth and self-confidence and self-reliance. I love you.

hisgoodbyenote

Mila. Thank you for being a friend in the most loving way possible. Thank you for your outlook on life. Thank you for making sure your friends feel well loved. Thank you for being so beautiful. Thank you for teaching me more about life than you'll ever know.

Christmas, Intensified

In acknowledgment of the fact that I "forgot" to blog for the 11 days before my last post, I'm going to try to cram an entire 11 days worth of Christmas cheer into one post.

Christmas is in six days. And, to clarify, for Christmas (some of it at least, because I have to go on Twitter. That's a given) we are expoloring the art of nothing. As in every time my tablet beeps, I click it off and ignore it. And, as much as this has always been my place to "feed the good wolf" and get away, the computer's not the place I want to be right now. There's Candyland and cookie dough and another Lifetime movie about a single mother who falls in love with a smoldering mountain man on Christmas Eve and lives happily ever after.

For the first time ever, we are "just us" on Christmas day. No grandmas or grandpas or other speck of extended gene pool. Just us, and we're rockin' it. (although, for the record Claire, if you happen to walk through our door on Christmas Eve to surprise us, I'd die a million deaths and be forever grateful...just sayin'.)

There's a lot I want to say. There's a whole lot of high-on-Christmas stuff flyin' around my brain these days, and I could gush disgustingly right now on just how much I love these days. But, you get it, right?

I've had this problem my whole life of visualizing what I want Christmas to look like. And it's always picturesque in this storybook kind of way almost to the point of ridiculousness. Like the burly father comes in from blustery winds bearing a heap of firewood, and children dressed in Christmas finest are huddled around a piano singing Silent Night in perfect harmony. Cue Mother busting through the kitchen door with rosy cheeks, a plastered smile and a golden turkey garnished with baked apples. And everyone lives happily ever after.

Okay, maybe we're not living in the late 1800's and maybe Laura Ingalls Wilder doesn't write my visions. But I have learned that real life is different from dream life, and I've managed to merge the two over the last three years. The moral of the story is this...If you want it, work hard to create it, but leave cushion for the unexpected and embrace everything outside of that "perfect" vision as good and meaningful parts of your story you would have never had the opportunity to know had you stuck to the script. Ad lib, go with it, swim with the current. In the end, what you will have created, albeit a Christmas memory or life's final script...it will be good.

We made Christmas cookies last night. Or let me clarify. We set out to make Christmas cookies, but one batch in, we fell victim to the charm of a movie and a fire and, forty minutes and a smoky kitchen later, we canned the cookie thing altogether.

But, you know, whatever.

And not to bring this to a choppy ending or anything, but I'm typing from my tablet and it's extremely annoying to do so. Point being, I'm going to Twitter. But you might want to visit this little space again tomorrow... I have a post lined up. A post that has been in the works for over 4 months. And it's really important to me because it's in the honor and dedication of a person who's really important to me. Guys... tomorrow is Mila's birthday. Enough said.

where i am

I don't know where to begin with the whole thankful thing or how to possibly put into words the way this holiday that comes tomorrow leaves me.

deeply grateful.
Last summer, I taped off a little section of my whiteboard, wrote "Today I'm happy for:" in it, and every day I changed, in bright colored markers, the little things I was happy for. smiles from a stranger. free perfume samples. conversations with my twitter friends. It became a game...to see what I was going to write that day, and my family used to tease me: "Seriously Naomi, you're thankful for COLORED PENCILS?" That aside, my insatiable desire to express my love for every bit of life soon wore off and it wasn't long before I forgot to do it. And then, not soon after that, my cat jumped on my whiteboard and it broke, and I completely forgot about writing down my happies.

It's so easy to forget the little things that make life so much better. And even if it's corny, we should always take the time to recongnize small things that make us smile. Things like poptarts, stickers and pizza.

I've started two things recently that I'm excited to share with you all really soon. Like, maybe the words "Happy Box" and "Happy Book" will be thrown around. Enough said.

Anyways, after I started my "Today I'm happy for:" board, my family would give out suggestions as to what I could write.

"Write the names of some of your twitter friends instead of just saying 'twitter friends'." - Savanna

"Scarves and bracelets." - Mom

"Music." - brother

"Meow." - Joel (really, one day I was thinking about what to write and he jumped on to my bed and meowed at me. So, I wrote Joel's meows and his capability to express himself.)

gratitude is contagious.

...and, stopping to really think about what we're thankful for from poptarts to the grander glorious blessings of family and friends happens to be very enjoyable...and therapeutic, might I add.

and speaking of grand and glorious, tomorrow will be just that. I'm so happy for this holiday -- the day that we look at everything and realize just how blessed we really are, even if it sometimes doesn't seem that way.

while tempted to start plunking away a rote list of what i'm thankful for tonight, it seems a bit prosaic for this place i'm at tonight. and it's exactly that--not just a state of mind or an emotion that bears this unworthy cliche' title like 'gratitude' or 'thankful.' no, it seems an actual place. its own little latitude where i have settled and claimed residence and walked its paths and met its people. and it is a good place. a real place with, yes, some dark corners and fixer-upper fields. but, overall there is just so much beauty here...and the more i stay, the more i see.

the place of gratitude...of knowing where we've been and where we're going and in between all that, recognizing that where we are is important.

breathing it all in tonight.
where i am.

so, with all that wonder aside...

i am thankful.

for days like today and the ability to notice their beauty.

for feeling like i'm right where i'm supposed to be every day.

for a family who appreciates the little things as much as i do.

for being loved by so many.

for creative expression.

for bodies that do what we want them to...without limitations.

and i'm thankful for my friends. Both off and on the screen.

the embodiment of so much beauty and love and goodness in my life...and the fullness you all bring to my heart. i get to know you. i get to be with you, or talk to you every single day. i get to be your friend. there's only one friend of yours that's exactly like this...and it's me. I get to do it. I get to know you guys.

i'm so thankful for that.
If you live in the United States, have a very, very, very blessed Happy Thanksgiving. And even if you don't live in the United States... be aware. Be happy. Be thankful.

I love you all so, so, so much.

Enjoying the so-very-blessed holiday.

-naomi

Dear Claire

I don't know that I can type an intro that is worthy of the love behind my friend Claire. The way she loves her idol is magic, but the way she loves the world around her makes me want to be a better person every day.

To me Claire is defined by her heart, the way she loves her friends, her sense of humor, her wit, her brilliant advice, her passion, good twitter packs, being from Nebraska and exploring the world around her with an open mind.

I haven't written a letter to anyone individually in a long time, but as usual, I watch the recipient of the letter more closely than usual, sentimentally aware of how much they've grown since I met them. 

And I haven't known Claire for an insanely high amount of time, but I've known her long enough to know that she's one of those people that only come around ocassionally. She's one of those people that I just admire and look up to so much. She's one of the people who I can talk about and my mom will know who she is just because I mention her so often. Like "I'm gonna go talk to Claire or Rafa or Mia or someone" and she'll reply "Oh, good! Have fun with your sisters."

Sister, that she is. Someone you really want to be around.

Thanks, internet.

Anyhoo, today I'm going to celebrate Claire through this blog post, and it makes me happy.
You know what else makes me happy? My timeline, my DMs, flooding with friends whose names are said many times in her tweets, because she has a deep recognition and appreciation for them. She knows our names and where we're from and what our favorite colors are and who can't eat peanut butter and whose birthday is next.

So I think it's time to rein in the introduction and get to what the title entails.

With no further ado...

****

Dear Claire,

I want to be this friend. The kind of friend that knows how to instantaneously put a smile on someone's face just with simple words. The kind of friend who is selfless, kind, loyal, dedicated, beautiful inside and out. I want to be like you, because that is the kind of friend you are.

And even though I may not be able to do justice to that fact with words, and in the end all of this might just be letters on a page, I'm going to try.

You help me when I'm vulnerable, you give out random compliments like you have some kind of radar that senses when I need one, you remember little details, you really listen, and you really care.

And when I talk to you I just feel like laying on the floor and throwing glitter up into the air while singing the chorus to Sweeter Than Fiction. Or eating skittles and swimming around in hot chocolate, and I feel like half my age.

We started DMing again after days and our forces have finally reunited to bring more moments like this to a floor near you. And half of your age plus half of my age equals something around one whole of us, so the mature moments are bound to happen eventually. The truth of the matter is my back went out this weekend--like I bent down to get something at the exact moment something snapped in my back and I screeched and collapsed and just laid there in some chalk-drawing crime scene position in the kitchen, laughing hysterically because I seriously couldn't move and you had just said something really funny and lying under the stove while people walk around you, pouring coffee and washing dishes completely oblivious to the scene is really, really funny..

So the laying on the floor, singing STF thing serves a purpose really.

Anyways...

I love you. What a beautiful person you are. A cute, funny thing who seeps joy and life and spirit into your little Claire aura. The aura that happens to grow a bit more to me each day. And while all the beauty you hold inside unfolds more each time we talk, I am finding that much like my admiration of you, that beauty is infinite. You don't realize that you're perfect, because you have the ability to be humble, and maybe a little blind to all the wonderful things about you, but you are stunning and amazing. You really really are. Your heart and soul are so genuine.

One of my favorite things about you is your independance and this perfectly balanced brew of confidence and uncertainty.

And the fact that I am in a big old heap of emotions right now, and I'm trying to hold it together as we DM about our crushes, because writing about you, describing you, knowing you is heaven. I just want you to know that if you're ever even remotely not happy, you can talk to me. The pain of seeing you hurt or fail or be sad will crush me because you only deserve to be happy, especially because you have reaped invaluable happiness to so many others.

And all the years I've dreamed of having a friend who I really truly look up to and love, I never would have guessed that it would amount to this here.

You have taught me so many things already.

You've most importantly taught me that loving your character this much has meant living up to everything about you that I wish I was.

I love your sweetness and your attitudes and your style and your instagram pictures and your account and your jokes and your hair and your fangirling.

And I love...you. But you already knew that, right?

Love, Naomi

Halloween 2013

Candy wrappers litter the carpet like loose confetti, my dark-lined eyes have been clean since Thursday night, and the mess in the yard echoes the remains of a good time--orange luminaire bags toppled over spilling kitty litter, tipped bikes where we deserted them, a plastic ghost table cloth torn and flapping in the (gasp) November breeze.

It was a great time.

First, the pre trick or treating preparations...

Kate's mom painted runes on her arms. Kate was a shadowhunter this year.

I was a fairy. Not Tinkerbell, though that's what everyone assumed. Just a fairy.

Bobby was a ninja.

Our trick or treating bags looked like this... "Have your parents check your treats" "Always trick or treat with a friend" "Stay in well lighted areas". Very cheesy. And they all ripped later that night and had to be replaced with pillow cases and Forever 21 shopping bags. But relevant enough.

 

The preparing was anticipation building and excitement inducing.

But the real fun started when the sun went down.

Important note: Our costumes are exactly matched to each of our personalities.

The trick or treating itself was amazing. We got so much candy, and it was one of our best years yet. One old lady gave us each a nickel. Holla.

After we were done, we went to McDonald's because we were in desperate need of some sort of nutrition that did not include sugar.

When we got home, we sat on the floor of Kate's bedroom and sorted and traded candy. Because, as our motto of the night proudly stated, "It's Tradition".

We reaped the rewards.

And, a video. Please take notice of our very inspiring discussion of: Twizzlers vs. Red Vines.

The first of the end-of-year holidays is down. Next up is Thanksgiving. And it's NOVEMBER! (confetti, confetti, confetti)

I am in love with holidays. I dig the whole over-hype and sparkle of decorations and Target setting up a small city of Christmas aisles the day after Halloween. I buy into the great to-do of kitschy bathroom towels embroidered with snowmen and freaking pinecones, and once one holiday is over, I am settin' up the excitement shop for the next one around the bend.

I realize there may be flaws to this philosophy and that real life is the in-between and, oh my, what my thirst for stars on my calendar must mean to some people.

But you know what else I think? To Thine Own Self Be True.

I fly my holiday freak flag proudly and am finding more and more ways to unfurl its enthusiasm on the in-between too.

It is all one, sewing together the nothingness with the spectacular, the ordinary day with the holiday and letting them seep into each other until you recognize and appreciate the magic of both a quiet cup of tea on an uneventful Monday morning and the colorful chaos of laughter around a Thanksgiving table right before the gravy is passed.

And the more you appreciate them both, the more of a master of "all is one" you become, brilliantly ladling the fabulousness of holidays onto ordinary days with spontaneous driveway dance parties and pulling out the good dishes for afternoon macaroni & cheese or rocking out red lipstick and two coats of black mascara for a morning of homework or cleaning your room.

One holds a spotlight to the other. The frenzy of festivities reminds me how I love the calm repose of our home routine and, likewise, the repetition of our beautiful ordinary allows me to plan for the wonder of holiday excitement. It is a good cycle. It is a grand challenge, that merge.

Looking out at the yard with its party remains that call for a clean-up and hoping for a quick decrescendo for my sugar buzz, I am grateful both for a fun night and the fact that it won't happen again for another year. That's the beauty of holidays...absence makes the heart grow fonder.

In the meantime, there's red lipstick and good dishes and dressing up in glittery wings on the day after Halloween.

It's November, Friends. November. With more holidays around the corner and (patting my chest)...beautiful ordinary here right now.